Navigating the Unmarked Path

Decisions Many times along our pathway in life we come to a point of decision making. Some of these decisions are ordinary, like whether to make a casserole or soup. Some are more serious, like when to take the family on a trip to visit Grandma. And some are really challenging, like changing jobs or dealing with relationship issues (at work or at home). Making good decisions takes discipline and the willingness to engage your thinking by using a few cues. Some of these cues you can arrange before you have to make the decision. Dreams, Goals, and Expectations Effective decisions enhance your personal dreams, goals and expectations. These change at different stages of your life. What was important in one stage of life has either been met or left behind. Now you need to rethink what is it that you are trying to accomplish. Consider the casserole versus soup decision. At 20 you are very busy and running around needing lots of carbs, at 45 you are spending time at the gym trying to keep your body trim and healthy, and looking for ways to cut carbs. Then, at 80, you might be trying just to stay healthy, so you might make a soup with some of the casserole ingredients. Different goals require different decisions. Decisions Impact Others Consider the impact that your decision will have on: long term goals, relationships with family members, expression of the talents loaned by your Creator. For instance, if you want to consider a job in a different location, what will you get out of that? What sacrifices will it require for you and your individual family members (spouse, children)? Will you be leaving behind a support network? Would this change represent a running towards or a running from something? Controlling Anxiety “Do not be anxious in anything.” (Phil 4:6). This is a good reminder, and it comes with an admonition that we present our concerns to our Creator with a thankful heart and expect to see a resolution or a suggestion. Anxiety diminishes creativity. And creativity is just what is needed to solve a sticky wicket decision. For instance, maybe moving the family may not be essential. Consider that this job could be accomplished remotely, with Zoom and some travel. Keep your heart open, and resolve to use your gifts for the work of your Creator. God’s creativity is greater than ours will ever be. If what is presented to you is part of His need for your talents, then you will be amazed at what you will see! Think of your Creator as saying, “Look, I’ve got this. You just be ready to do the work!” There are stories both from family members and people we read about in books, who had a dream that included God as the Director of their Dream Team. Here is an example from my world. An engineer with 8 children became frustrated because his bosses would keep his inventions as their own and without credit to him. He made the incredible decision build his own company; he implemented his dream. He also designated God as his primary Director, with whom he conferred daily. He enlisted all of his family members to help with this effort in some way; they became part of his Dream Team. Fifty years later, his company was nationally known, his inventions were prominent technology and his faith was still strong. All 8 of the children had fine educations, strong marriages and children of their own, and he helped to build a church in his community. When he passed away at 100, he was able to support many causes that represented his values and interests. He is one of my great heroes. Values My Hero assessed his values, which became the standards used for decision making. Here is a question he used. What is important to you emotionally, intellectually, physically, and spiritually? What is important to you represents the values that you hold dear. These may also be linked to your strengths, and your dreams. Write them down—or draw pictures that represent what is important to you. Then consider how your decision will impact the values that you have. Will the decision enhance or compromise your values? Policies Create a set of policies that align with your goals and support your values. These policies are statements that you make to remind you to protect your values and your goals. Here are some examples: I organize my day to enhance my talents and skills. I read about and watch videos about people who used their creativity solve problems. I review my values and goals before I make decisions. I include my Creator in order to address the anxieties of decision making. Your policies can also acknowledge your own weaknesses and allow you to fend off demands on your time, energy, and income that do not support your dream. I make choices based upon how they support my dream. I put away a certain percentage of earnings to support my dream. I donate a certain percentage of my earnings to benefit others. I focus my energy only on the activities to support my dream and my values. Decisions? So, now that you have the cues, it is time to think about those decisions that you think you want to make, and the dreams you want to implement. It might take some time to put together your decision chart. You will need to identify goals, values, and commitments (to your Dream Team). This exercise will provide you with a set of standards you can use when you have to make “sticky-wicket” decisions, and make your dreams a reality.

Awakening Every step you take presents a change: a change in what you are experiencing, what you see in front of you; a change in your thought process. If you are on a journey to find yourself, a mountain hike, or a trek through the park, or even a walk around the block can be a great chance to experience differences and newness. This experience is likely to awaken images or thoughts that bring about an awareness of something prodding you to do something different. You may come to a point of decision, a light in the path, that jostles the thought pattern, a wake-up with new insights. This could be the still, small voice of God guiding you toward a purpose that is larger than yourself. Who is in Charge? Now, you may think that you are the one in charge of your life. But have you ever noticed that many of the plans that you thought you had were really half-baked and took you nowhere? Did you ever hear the challenge in your heart: “what are you doing here?” This could be right when you were about to do something you would regret forever. Or it could be while you were wandering around in the wilderness of your worries, or lost in a cave of distress, like Elijah (1Kings 9:9). Or, perhaps, you were startled by a dream or a vision where you heard your name called. Young Samuel, before he became a prophet, heard the Voice calling him in the middle of the night and he finally responded with “Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.” (1Samuel 3:9-10). Purpose Our Creator has a purpose for us. He engages us with subtle words or flashes of insight. The Creator provided Elijah with nourishment and a new set of tasks during the depths of his despair and fear. Elijah was receptive. Being receptive means that we are aware that we need help, and we are willing to listen. Many people who are now recovering from an addiction will say that when they hit bottom they experienced a vision or a message from their Creator. Samuel was just a young boy, but he was called by God to initiate a new direction for his people. He was willing. We must also be willing to listen. In the Karate Kid, Mr. Miagi made this point by pouring tea into his student’s cup until it ran over. He explained to the Kid, you will not be able to learn until you empty your cup. We must be willing to engage in a purpose that is beyond our selfish interests. It is in humility that we find that receptiveness to explore our purpose. We can engage with the Creator to fill us with light so that we can see, and, understand how to use our gifts to address the needs we find in our communities. Engaging So what does it mean to engage in the purpose? Engage means to step up and take action. Most people want meaning and mission in their lives. It is important that they feel engaged in something that makes a difference. The process of engagement requires awareness. Take the opportunity on your journey to be aware of your gifts and your blessings. It is too easy, even prideful to dwell upon your anger, disappointments, or losses. Think back to the times when you were feeling connected. Or, remember when you used the special talents and gifts that engage you. Consider what kind of problems you helped others to solve. These could be as simple as pulling weeds in Grandma’s garden; or, as challenging as writing a software program that allows people to monitor their blood pressure. Look for the Creator’s guidance. St Augustine said: Pray as though everything depended on God. Work as though everything depended on you(1). 1https://www.brainyquote.com/authors/saint‐augustine‐quotes

The Loneliness of Change

Pathways Can Feel Chaotic

Into the Unknown

Fire of Conflict

When is there Time for Me? 

How often do you actually stop on your path, and focus on the sunset or the sunrise? I have a group of friends who send pictures of our mountains in the morning or in the late afternoon. Some of the colors are so spectacular. Clouds can be that way also. Each cloud has its own shape — one that dissipates as you watch it.

The smoke billowed up into the atmosphere, and the wind was blowing the burned magazine pages and pieces of newspapers right into our yard. Even pieces of shingles blew into our yards that night. We lived 8 miles from the hills that were burning. It was hard to breathe. Many of my friends were in the long lines of cars coming out of the housing developments that were on engulfed. They said that the smoke was so thick, all they could think about was how to breathe without inhaling the ashes. Only the tail lights of the cars in front of them, showed them how to get out of the area. Smoke swirled around the cars, like so many snakes.  The smell carried to our house as well. It wasn’t like the smell of a bon fire, it was sharp and stung our lungs. It wasn’t just trees and wood that was burning, it was shingles, paint, tar, plastic, furniture. People with lung diseases were sick for days after. The sky was lit up behind the smoke as the fire consumed the pine trees all the way up the mountain pass. Even from our house we could see the tree crowning in sections of the mountains. It was a scary night and we could not go to sleep thinking about the hundreds of families who were evacuated from the mountain side estates. We were glued to the TV to hear what was happening. Several tourist attractions and ranches burned to the ground. Homes were lost, and two people were killed by the fire. The weird thing about the fire was that it hopped over some of the houses, leaving them standing as lone sentinels in a field of chimneys and cement sidewalks. It took a good 36 hours for the firemen to contain the fire, and when it was all over, the burned pine trees looked like tufts of hair on an old man’s head. News videos of the once luscious pine green forest that blanketed the canyons and mountain sides showed blackened hills with burnt stakes that had once been trees. Driving up the pass, news cameras showed the line where the fire was contained by the firefighters to the north side of the pass. They followed the U.S. President has he gazed upon the devastation.